Choking on your fear

Misses and kisses

2011-07-05T01:35:00.003+08:00

I spent the night thinking and I'm actually missing alot of people right now. Today's a weird one where people I haven't been contacting for so long suddenly popped out of nowhere. That's love right there guys HAHA. Omg mizz you guys like crazy. It actually made me realize that there are so many people out there that I should be meeting up with instead of cooping myself up thinking of you huh.

Mizz you ying nat xy sophz jared mateenadamlee maha peter kcpboyz k I can't think of anymore names but I'm also really glad for the people that are in my life right now like the lagoonboyz kj etc, and tay and derek who bought me a burberry scent from hk (brolove!) and of course honeyHAM LOL k as you requested!

A big big heart for you guyz <3

Eh matt call me asap pls you last warning sia!

Spacebound

2011-06-28T00:40:00.005+08:00

Haha so the only time I blog is when I feel like shit.

Talking to a good friend right now to prevent myself from crying. Hope I don't jinx myself by saying that..... K for now I feel that I fucking love you and you changed for the better so that's a really good start for you :) and it somehow made me reflect on myself: I'm sucha fucking failure for an 18yro. Surprise surprise?

Experience for one, tried being a party animal but the fun stops right there in the club. Then there's no more good in that. I really wanna try everything in life. Just for the sake of satisfying my curiosity. Also cause I could say I've been there done that. But growing older scares me; I don't have much time left to enjoy myself. Maybe that's why I'm unable to focus on anything right now cause I'm in the middle of thinking for the future and letting loose. Indecisive soul self-sigh :( Lolol.
Which brings me to my next point. A friend told me once that I have to make great use of what I have right now. Point being that even if I believe that I'm in the wrong course(regrets like a mafucker) I might as well achieve the best of it. I just can't find the right motivation to strive in excellence for studies. Proven by all the Fs I get in all my cts hahaha. I can't believe I can still think that as a joke..... *pats self on back

Anybody who stumbles upon this blog of rantings are prolly people who are close enough to know the only thing I wanna do in life when I grow up is music. I've said this many many times but I still have to emphasize: I know I'm good, but I don't know if I'm FUCKING GOOD to be able to make it. It's hard living in a country who belittles this path thinking there is no future in whoever is pursuing it. Yup great life I have.
It has been the only thing I could take seriously and let's face it, it's so much easier pursuing something that people can say "wow you're actually good at it". But hey then again I'm fucking 18yro for fuck's sake and have not done anything in life to pursue either, being music or doing exceptionally good in studies. To be honest I'm only in poly so that I could get the diploma and then get the fuck out of school to focus solely on music and music only. Diploma is plan B: something I could fall on when I fail. Sadly, I am not a very confident person.
Then there's plan C: dad's business. I love him so much and I know he's working his ass off to build this factory all over again. Yes I used to be wealthy but trust was put into wrong hands and almost all was gone so all he could do is take what he has left and put it to what hopefully seems has good future. I wanna help him when I'm capable enough, but I want to climb that ladder of success by myself and not depend on my dad. Don't get me wrong, I don't think I'm useless and I think I would be one helluva good businesswoman(business studies was my first choice hello? Hahaha k it doesn't prove anything but still...) but when the business really takes off before it is going to be handed to me... Hell, I wouldn't want you to look down on me and think I got fed by luck would I? I wanna prove that I could be of good use and that leads back to studies again. Seriously wtf writing this post makes me think of a greater failure that I am. I can't blame anyone but myself for this anyway.

To you: If you look at it this way, we are actually on the same boat. I know you haven't found anything to strive for in life yet, but you will. I'm in no better position than you you see... I don't even have the confidence to believe I can make it and you know I'm no risk-taker. And I should have known better than to doubt our relationship. I meant it when I said I fucking love you.

Okay it seems like my fever has screwed my brain cells and somehow I'm writing gibberish that I think only I can understand lol. 3 days mc to coop myself up at home and self-reflect :) And of course there are projects to be done.....

Will miss you now that you have such little time for me. Who am I kidding? You don't have time for me at all. Ah that's life anyway we don't always get what we want. Bros over hoes are shit btw. Guys who say that rarely meant it. Regardles I'm still gonna wish you were here <3

This post makes me sound like I'm wallowing in self pity but that's better than people pitying me. I need empathy not sympathy. When I fall again will you pick me up like you did the last time?

cause I'm so over bein blue cryin over you~

2011-06-26T01:29:00.008+08:00

It has been long... Been long since I felt so happy, been long since I unloaded all the shit, just purely enjoying myself.
I long for those days, when everything seemed so easy and felt that nothing could destroy the moment. Or at least I thought it would last. Don't know what you got til you lose them huh... Yesterday made me realise, I don't think I like you enough to prepare to lose everything to you. Even if it were to ever happen, I would fail you so why bother? Can't possibly expect you to like me since I don't really like myself that much either right? Haha self-respect searching in progress. It might just be a phase to you, but it's rock bottom for me. A part of me wants to fight for a war that would take everything I'm left of right now. Just cause I CAN. Maybe it's cause everyone's misery is really good company. If I can't get what I want then why should you?
But there are some people in life right now that somehow changed a little in me. I don't see the NEED to do that anymore; not necessarily mean I do not want to. Just tired of really going to such great lengths just so that people I really hate fall hard. Hate is a strong word, but it's just cause I loved them once before. Has it really been that long?

Truth is I really missed you.

Sucks when your whole mood depends solely on how one fucking soul is treating you. You get what I mean? Crying over it is easy, moving on and actually dealing with it is the hard part. Amuses me when I know hey, I don't believe in love and all that bullshit, at least not the romantically involved type, but I can't go on a week without crying myself to sleep. Well it makes me doubt myself, resulting in more questions to ask...
What is the purpose in life? Why am I doing so much shit JUST to make others feel better when I can't even help myself? Why can't you help me in return? You just simply can't fucking bother? Or are your priorities lying somewhere else. That's no longer a question. I know the answer. I should know the answer.

Hope fucks your life upside down. Trust me.

Becauseee... We all carry these things inside that no one else can see they hold us down like anchors they drown us out at sea! Hahaha have to see Oli Sykes at least once before I die. So morbid lolol.

(L)(L)(L)

2011-06-16T21:49:00.002+08:00

HI LIAN. You're coming back in 6days yayyy! Holidays have been so so so boring and I'm counting down the days til I see you hehehehe. Be touched k. I've got so much to update you about........ LIKE DID I TELL YOU I SHAVED MY SIDES? HAHAHA. Okok aren't you supposed to be studying right now???? I know you have crazy packing to do after your exams but look forward to it, it beats studying anytime ^^ Plus you'll get to see us in Singapore! You better make time for us kkkkkk! Hen xiang ni hehehehe (L)

PEN DOWN

2011-06-03T01:18:00.002+08:00

So where do I start now? When exams are just around the corner I have to be stuck with this feeling of pain. Pain everytime I see you. The little hope I get everytime I spend time with you. It's pretty much killing me. After all that we've been through, it's hard to let go. I used to think it was like fate brought us together, but it's not working out well I suppose. And I'm stuck in the middle with choices but I can't get my act together. I have my pride to save, but on the other hand the pain is really, really, ripping my hearts out. My stomach churns and churns at the thought of losing you. Aren't you supposed to be my pillar of strength? The hope is hanging by a small piece of thread. Don't let me think meeting you was a mistake cause that's how I'm starting to feel right now. Looking back it was so much easier not knowing you. But then again you were the one who was there for me when I needed a listening ear most. Where are you now? You just have to come back into my life and destroy it once again don't you? Maybe all I wanted was just to win. I will never ever lose.
Seriously never.

i'm back like a ninja wooooo!

2010-06-25T01:36:00.002+08:00

MY MOTIVATION TO BLOG IS DYING. And this space is dead anywayzzz so I am thinking of shutting it down. Like very soooon.
THIS WEEK:
Monday-shopping
Tuesday-Te Deum
Wednesday-SHERILYN SIA AND SF WITH BANGZZZ
Thursday-PW
Friday-CHOMPS!

OH MY FUCKING MUNDANE WEEK. I think the word mundane is mundane....... Hahahahahahahahaha.

I was looking back. It was weird... It doesn't blend right then. Look at us now. Can't wait to grow up. Let's grow old together... Searching for someone I don't even know. That's the worst feeling of a lost sheep in the woods. Do you get me?

Sufang is contagious. I am blabbering. _|_ you blabbering fish with bangzzz.

Thermacare

2010-06-12T22:32:00.003+08:00

We all know by now that you're the only thing you talk about
We all know by now that things won’t work out
No, you’ve got nothing to say
And I swore as I left you’d go and fuck someone else,
You whore.

uneasy hearts weigh the most

2010-06-09T19:25:00.003+08:00

Holy shit he smells like heaven
Been best friends since we were eleven
And oh my god I like him
I am a million fucking bucks
I am a thousand fucking bucks
Your bitch is dead she was hit by a truck
What the fuck?!

knife

2010-06-06T00:39:00.003+08:00

These past few days have been mad hectic and I can say is one of my lowest points in life. The deep shit I have gotten myself into in the past I have escaped but wtf not now. One shit after one shit on 2 consecutive days. Gimme a break.
But great great awesome friends have been with me all this while and I love love you guys for walking along with me through this darkest journey and comforting me and giving me words of advice. Love you sister love you brother for keeping this secret for so long. Omg damn mushy sia! 2weeks til this whole shit is over. HOPEFULLY.

sailing ship

2010-06-03T02:27:00.002+08:00

We all carry these things
Inside that no one else can see
They hold us down like anchors
They drown us out at sea
I look up to the sky
There may be nothing there to see
But if I don't believe in him
Why would he believe in me?

STUDYING FAIL

2010-05-31T00:59:00.004+08:00

Right, common test is tmr and I don't have a single clue about wtf is happening in the world of lights. Encountering familiar faces in the library don't help when I'm trying to study. EH HI GLEN!!!!!!! And I can't study cause I am fucking having a headache now!!!

E=IcosTITA/d^2
F=4pieI
Accent lighting, effect lighting, decorative lighting, structural lighting, mood lighting.
MOOD LIGHTING IS THE ABILITY TO SWITCH OR DIM THE LIGHTS TO CREATE A SPECIFIC AMBIENCE.

Epic fail.

The boy who could fly

2010-05-29T19:54:00.002+08:00

I'll be the brightest someday, I'll be the brightest you'll see.
Now as the rain falls like shattered pieces of glass from the sky, we bleed like water colors and drunken pastels down the stairways. And I ask myself, why do I still pray? When will it end and who fucking cares?
I swear to God I did what I could, I practically begged you, I pretended everything was fine.
A soul sacrifice, an American nightmare;
I'd rather be dead.

Sometimes love dies like a dog.

worlds away

2010-01-08T02:11:00.002+08:00

Miss you love you Sherilyn Sufang and Mateen Leeeee.
Sounds weird saying that hahahahahahahahaaha.

And youuuuuuuuu.

Results better get me into your poly.

I'M LAZY TO POST PICTURES SO THIS WILL DO

2010-01-05T23:43:00.007+08:00

Probably almost a month since I last blogged.

A little late but wtf everyone has blogged about their summary of 2009 already. Anyway last 2months of 2009 has been the best months I ever ever had and that's cause I'M FUCKING OUT OF SCHOOL. And also realised that my colleagues are one of the awesomest people I have ever met.

So these past few days have been spent slacking at city hall after work then countdown and stayover with Sf. And just realised that the more I spend time at work the more I realise how much I don't care about anything else in KCfuckingP. They are non judgemental.

So the point of this post is....
I LOVE ICE BLAST.

2009-12-12T14:40:00.002+08:00

Fuck lah starting work tmr not that it's a bad thing but the fucking uniform omgggg. Looking forward to 18th and countdown but getting excited just means disaster awaits.
Will miss you sherilyn and sf and sauna :(

Ying I can see your face EVERYDAY ALMOST EVERY HOUR MWAHAHAHAH.

2009-12-06T22:59:00.002+08:00

HAHAHAHA HE GETTING HOTTER OKAY.

broke

2009-12-05T01:31:00.003+08:00

1. Craig Owens tattoo-ed pacman ghosts on both thumbs omgggg so cute.
2. Boys Like Girls have the gayest and stupidest name in the whole of band history.
3. Paramore tix in soundwave sold out. (hahahaha matt)
4. I want a job. Fuck you G2000 can you faster call me.
5. I AM BROKE. I OWE YING $76. I LOVE YOU YING. THIS SHOWS THAT LOVE CAN BE BOUGHT HAHAHAHAHAHA.
6. SF YOU ZAI. SEE YOU ON 31ST LETS DRINK.
7. SHERILYN SIA I KNOW I FAT.

to be scared by an owl

2009-11-30T16:45:00.006+08:00

Haven't been updating at all recently but all's good! Not sure if I'm going to keep this blog alive cause it's pretty much dead now right. Prom/tonning session up on facebook but I may be posting some up some other time. Patience!

2009-11-22T11:09:00.009+08:00

Once I get my paycheck I shall do alkaline perm like Nicole Fox's :)
G2000/zara pleaseeeee accept me x100000000000000000000000000.

:D

2009-11-05T19:31:00.000+08:00

your blessing is like godsend!!!

YAY.

2009-11-04T15:19:00.005+08:00

As much as I LOVE Craig Owens, it's irritating and sick to see people commenting on every chiodos video saying "Craig Owens IS chiodos, it will never be the same again without craig." blahblahblah. Everyone knows they're gonna suck so shut up. EVERY SINGLE VIDEO SIA. He is not the band, he merely is a great vocalist of a band with his super unique voice. BUT STILL he does not make the whole band. The band writes songs together with him. IF he is the band, the name of the band would be CRAIG OWEN'S BAND and not CHIODOS. Wtf damn irritating. But I still hope Chiodos sucks like shit. Because afterall I'm only a Craig Owens fan and not a Chiodos fan. Peace.

Omg last 2 subjects!!!

/edit. Omg some idiot gave me wrong info telling me Austin Carlile is the new singer for chiodos. He didn't even quit Of Mice And Men!!! The auditions are still on I think.

craig owens

2009-10-09T00:08:00.002+08:00

Craig's voice control is like BOOMZ man.

hiatusss

2009-09-26T19:55:00.003+08:00

SEE TITLE.

My last words are: Ying I love you hahahahahaha even though you are so mean to me :D

no match

2009-09-21T00:45:00.005+08:00

"Didn't mommy tell you never to play with fire?"

emarosaaa

2009-09-20T02:11:00.003+08:00

If anyone should get famous it should be him and not talenless people like Taylor Swift and JoBros who only depend on looks to get famous overnight. Their voices are nothing beyond normal. Dylan is the real deal!

Johnny Craig is the man!

2009-09-18T22:11:00.002+08:00

A corrupted life is always better than a dull life.

SEMI PRECIOUS WEAPONS

2009-09-16T21:57:00.003+08:00

WOO Justin Tranter!

I don't get how fking ugly rotten guys can get girls like that. Not justintranter though....he's like freaking beautiful. WTF how can guys get so pretty like that?

Hahahahaha sorry matt I can't go compass point today cause it's bloody tiring. You owe me menthol. Friday.

2009-09-11T21:56:00.010+08:00

Pretty lights at night cheer me up a little.

Went to the library to borrow Hail Ceasar. Yeah it's a pretty damn cliche book but I like reading cliche! Antm cycle 13 is reallyyyyyy interesting and I really like Nicole she is sooo pretty like the girl on the book cover.

:(

2009-09-08T23:34:00.015+08:00

Past 2days was filled with idkkk.....unplanned plans. Sunday fangz called me to go shop for heels but I was supazzz brokexzxz and she got herself some super cute shoes cause the pumps she borrowed from me were hurting her bad lol! And yesterday went down to the library planning to study with xy after school but Daniellexxx called to have lunch and she did some manicure while I watched and we caught up after 100000months. Then went to meet the fangz. Gonna study like mad for prelims tmr then down to the library with Matt on thursday then go shop somemore on friday and catch time traveler's wife!

Hope your stomach churn bad seriously then you realise that Phoebs is causing me guilt :) Woo I rock.

To the sister: REMEMBER MY F21 PIECE! MSN ME KAY!

2009-09-05T14:12:00.005+08:00

Have about 100+ pictures on baybeats night but it would consume too much time to upload all or even half of it soooo yeah. Next time I guess.

Sufang my friend you are addicted to sticks(you know) and me! :D

Baybeats 09

2009-08-31T20:48:00.009+08:00

Anberlin was freakin' hackin' awesome. Love you STEPHEN CHRISTIAN you freaking smiled at me when giving me the autographs which I laminated and I love you a billion times more <3333

More up tmr!

BAYBEATS 09

2009-08-29T20:39:00.004+08:00

Was supposed to stay at home tmr for the whole day to study for prelims but..

AM GONNA GO CATCH ANBERLIN INSTEAD SO KISS MY CONSTIPATED GLEEFUL FACE SUCKAXZXZXZXZ! \m/

SEE YA :D

Silhouettes in sunsets

2009-08-23T12:15:00.003+08:00

Gonna study on a sunday afternoon cause being down with fever+cough sucks much.

Missed you x74896521. Still am.

winter coats and uk dreams :(

2009-08-17T22:35:00.011+08:00

Blogger screwed up so don't blame me for the delay. Plus there are more to come which I would prolly post some time later. Blogger is a bitch.bitch.bitch.

casted

2009-08-15T00:18:00.004+08:00

Bricks are falling on you, I can't save.
The sacrifice would be sucha waste,
On you.

But truth is, I really missed you.
Come back my once almost.......

Ah I'll upload the rest up tmr.

Skins ftw!

2009-08-09T00:14:00.005+08:00

I'm bored so i feel like posting. National day celebration was pretty gay lol but I was super high and kept irritating victorialimxzxzxz with LEIGHTON MEESTER'S BEAUTY. Then at 10 found out that matt overslept sooo ->went down to thomson plaza(icekimo first which was closed) with ying xueying sherilyn cheryl peijia ->yamaha ->icekimo ->G.I. JOE ->met matt ->home ->skins. Cried from watching how the life they had were so fucked up thanks to mostly environment. Stephen Michael Kane is damn sweet to cass can.

reese's pieces, i don't know who john cleese is.

2009-08-01T22:55:00.003+08:00

C'mon get over her.

Studying during the weekends totally fail lol. Last chance tmr :(

/edited.

timopoon: eh i can't remember if i eat my medicine already or not.
phoebs: how the hell can't you remember if you eat your medicine already or not?
timopoon: that's why! sua lah just eat.
phoebs: oh maybe you took your medicine already but your medicine gave you brain damage so you forgot that you took it already.
timopoon: your head.
phoebs: no. your head. hahahahahahahaha.

Funny what. Laugh with me!

I said I saw it coming.

2009-07-30T20:32:00.004+08:00

The mocks aren't over yet but I'm back. Rejoice please.

Yesterday I sat on my bed, thinking of what has been happening recently. And then I took out a book and scribbled almost everything that I've been feeling. No one knows. Except the blue book which reflects everything that I am.

It felt good.

False hopes one after another. I'm just selfish like that.

this romantic tragedy

2009-07-21T00:19:00.002+08:00

Hi the blog is dead.
Will blog only after mocks. Go set some alarm or something. And that's provided if I have something interesting to post. Now school is just taking too much time and school sucks.

Matt if you see this reply me. I didn't see your msn!!!

Til then. Don't bother coming here it won't be updated til whenever I want lol.

no.1 laziest

2009-07-08T21:31:00.003+08:00

You can totally crown me that man.

wake up> school> subway> home> sleep> skins

GG. FUCK ORAL.

p/s oooooh i loike your aussie accent.

skins

2009-07-05T22:23:00.002+08:00

Oh mannn chris lolll.

Season1 down. Can't seem to find S2E1 like anywhere. Trying to download via torrent vuze but slow like @($*#)$#. Go watch good shit.

Semi-porn alert.

p/s Sorry if I don't reply you or anything cause I'm busy watching skins LOL. Ya lah addicted lah orals how lah.

Come home

2009-06-30T23:00:00.002+08:00

Omg feel damn sad and feel like crying after listening to this.

Tmr school ends at 12 and there's lit at 3. I'm so gonna skip lit man. But going home at 12 is just gay BUT who the hell finishes school at 12 man so I'm gonna go home. Yes I'm a loser like that but it beats having lessons so I so ownz your pawz \m/

To ah paaaa:
Guess you're having a really rough time and it's way bigger compared to my problem. And I know how many times I said cheer up you wouldn't. Hope you're reading this. The hurt will fade soon.

p/s lazy post pictures sorryzzz. have to do bio and ss :(

Hi no-lifer. No going out go mug Phoebs.

clarke quay

2009-06-28T17:50:00.020+08:00

Uploaded half only cause lazy. Going out in abit.

Homework no need to do already man. GG LIAOXZZXZXZXZ.

FUCK ALL YOU TEEN GIRLS WHO ARE DEPRESSED OVER BOYS AND BOYS ONLY. PEOPLE IN AFRICA ARE DYING MAN and all you can think of is... Every blog I go I see crap like that. _|_ Complaining is one thing, being depressed over such matter is just gay.

Yesterday's

2009-06-27T22:15:00.062+08:00

Nat grab your peeks :)

I'm gonna upload my pictures bit by bit everyday til finish (although the bit is about this amount) but that's good right.
The flea was packed madness that we left after 5mins and during the 5mins I saw quite a number of people I knew already. Mad.

2009-06-24T03:11:00.001+08:00

Will upload pictures by friday/saturday. Bought a new cam :):):) I think I got 200+ pictures to upload already danggg. Goodnight world the whole house is asleep except me.

2009-06-17T22:46:00.002+08:00

Hihihihi omg so long since I last entered here. Sorry for the lack of updates but I'm too lazy to post pictures(I got 100+ omggg) or update on anything that have been happening these few weeks. And my com crashed lah so I've been using my brother's. So we'll seeeee.. Actually I wanted to say something damn mean but nevermind lah I shall be nice :):):):) And not drag Ying into the picture, RIGHT YING?! p/s I freaking love your new 10.1mgp cam <3

p/p/s Eh btw Desiree said there's an event at butter on the 23rd leh anybody wanna come?!

p/p/p/s Sufang (and me also lah) is mad about Lelouch that she called the freaking cute baby with puffy cheeks and striped swimming costume and super cute lips Lelouch. His name is Tan Kai Yan. He is the small little friend we made in the swimming pool. He likes us alot cause he kept looking at us when we were stalking him and when he was blowing bubbles and when he was leaving LOL.

p/p/p/p/s Hi great singapore sale we're gonna make use of you as much as we can on friday. I'm not really sure who are the WEs lah cause last minute cancellations ALWAYS HAPPEN. Screw that.

:(

2009-06-05T04:15:00.002+08:00

The clock is telling me to sleep. But I seriously can't. I'm bored like hell so I'm here. And I totally don't know what to write. I'm really bored. There's school in 4hours time. I'm still bored.

I'm made of wax, Larry, what are you made of?

2009-06-04T19:56:00.011+08:00

So the past week has been filled with stupid srps which are a waste of everybody's time cause everybody was too sleepy to actually learn anything. And lit seminars where me, Sufang, Roy, Timo, Wenfeng were too restless to listen and we did stupid stuff like Timo spamming 20 hi messages and me and Sf "watching videos". Omg -_- Today's lit seminar was actually okay and Sherilyn was like beside me talking crap and laughing at stupid things hahahahhaha.
Anddd finally went to frolics with Matt. Yayness. As Nat says, going there seriously lowers down self esteem LOL. After that we went to CHOMPCHOMP. Okay that name got stuck in our heads and we kept saying chompchomp chumpchump like repeatedly.
Hopefully me and Ying can go shop tmr cause monday was a failure lol. Then come over my house and eat the boxes of icecream my mom spam bought :D & HOPE HOPE HOPE she would allow the stayover at Nat's house next week. Nat you're dying to see me now right? :)

a day to remember

2009-05-31T18:03:00.002+08:00

They used to tell me you got to choose a side. Now it's four years later and they beg for advice. Don't trust the critic she's a cynic, make the call for yourself. This is my 10-step course to not be like everyone else. I know, it's not the easiest route. And I know, it leaves you overflowing with doubt. But if you want it you can have it, hope it's all that you dreamt. Cause once you got it you're gonna get it, you won't be leaving this.
You can't trust everyone you meet, they never meant that much to me. Go tell them, go tell them, it's not as simple as you think.
Clenched fists held above me, you will never bring me to my knees. I said clenched fists held above me, you will never bring me to my knees. You'll get what you deserve.

2009-05-29T00:56:00.002+08:00

Brandon and Greg damn hot right!!!<33333333

You're getting more like a dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog dog okay I feel so much better. Suckaxzxzxzxzxzxz.

when craig mabitt meets estk

2009-05-26T22:24:00.004+08:00

Omg rocks socks. Just found out their album is released on 2june. But I've got their songs already :D

p/s I'm gonna get myself an ipod omg.

PHOEBE; says:
that will be classic
"Roy!" says:
ipod classic
timo says:
yes ?
PHOEBE; says:
-_-
"Roy!" says:
hi 5
timo says:
ipod touch ?
timo says:
how are you doing
timo says:
LOL
"Roy!" says:
yes?
PHOEBE; says:
omg
"Roy!" says:
oh hi classic
timo says:
wheres nothing
"Roy!" says:
oh nothing
PHOEBE; says:
EH YOU DAMN BAD SIA
"Roy!" says:
classic hears nothing

-__________________________-

2009-05-26T15:12:00.002+08:00

Haha I skipped school and accompanied mom to the airport to fetch her friends. Anything beats school. School sucks. So all of you are still in school while I'm at home.

I rock.

People like Ying and Sherilyn and Sufang are missing me now right.

:DDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

Gonna watch movies after movies whole day before the horror tmr: chinese mocks. Bye bye bye bye bye.

hollywood undead

2009-05-23T18:50:00.003+08:00

Got knocked out from drinking last night, I think. Omg felt like a loser. Only had 2glasses and I looked like I got sunburnt. Damn gay. 3nights ago I drank a can of beer and I looked like I got rashes all over my face. I bet you are laughing at the back of your hand.

Okay now I'm really scared of the result slip. I was so scared I didn't even take back my lit paper yesterday and walked out of school. And according to poon he shouted my name and I didn't hear at all. Must be paranoia. Omg. Fuck. Scared. :(

2009-05-21T21:56:00.004+08:00

Results were.. somewhat okay. Although I failed chem. But it is an improvement considering that I failed 4 subjects last year righttt? Biggest shock: passed chinese. 11 more days to chinese O's =/
So I went to find Matt after school at ps macs just now. And since he's schooling beside me we won't need to wait for a few weeks til we hang out again hahaha. Loved the present btw :D Love my fireflight cd too righttt.

Eh sorry poon I think you look damn pretty here.

Be glad I didn't even post the greencow and all your coloured cows. But very cute leh.

2009-05-18T00:40:00.005+08:00

It's past midnight and I'm still up. There's chinese and bio tmr. Good job. And I've spent the entire day:
1. watching disney channel and nick
2. catching up with Matt and I just found out that he has always been schooling beside me after 1month -_-
3. might consider going to poly
4. talking to poon about our future in music and designing (that is if I go to poly) and we're still doing that right now lol
5. texting Sufang about..things
6. listening to Meg&Dia and Anarbor
7. a lil bit of bio

Very little of bio actually. I just read the chapters from homeostasis onwards. Totally forgot everything about kidneys until Ying told me. Omg. And I almost forgot there's chinese paper tmr. AND I'm still speechless about..let's say it's something that links Matt and bishan. Yes the point's on top.

Say hi to Oli Sykes and me :D I'm so full of myself I'm so like Tyson hahaha.

Webcamming now LOL. So much for studying. + survivor finale tmr;amaths die.

2009-05-16T21:05:00.008+08:00

She wants to touch me woo she wants to love me woo she'll never leave me woo don't trust the ho never trust the ho don't trust the ho don't trust me! Omg addictive ownz yawz pawz.

Whine man whineeeeeeeeeeeee.

I'm bored. Study Phoebs study! Omg you're sucha pig.
I pray pray pray singapore would go back to orange or red alert or something since swine flu hit malaysia! Pleaseeeeeeeeee.
Thanks Nat for dgd! :D
And hate Coach sucka Coach hate Coach. Sufang you hate Coach now right? ;)

ancient photos

2009-05-14T15:15:00.004+08:00

Don't.

2009-05-05T20:41:00.005+08:00

I gained weight like nuts. So I went jogging with my brother, who lost alot of weight recently and his arm is like on a cast btw, to burn calories today after I got back from j8 with Sherilyn, Sophie and Peijia(cause lit was cancelled -_-). Omg felt so good although tiring.

One week has passed and it was a good week. But now I feel uneasy, like you just betrayed me. I thought it was okay but omg it hurts so much after I read that message she sent you. Please, don't leave. Yeah I don't depend on you like you're my life and motivation whatever cheesy shiz (like without you I'm nothing fuck), but you are an important parcel of my life and I cherish you, unlike others who just threw you under the bus, right? I might come off as if I don't care but wtf, you know I do, and I know you do too. I just don't express myself well enough..

This only implies to you(and maybe a few deserving others), but proud to say, always there when you need someone.

So what if I sound like my presence is great. It is what. LOL.

p/s eh ying that implies to you too. I am nice right. LOVE YOU. (can you please stop accusing me of hating you -_-)

maybe

2009-04-29T23:30:00.000+08:00

C'mon pen down all your miserable lives/thoughts whatever down cause reading them may just make me feel better. Maybe. Yes I enjoy watching others' misery to make me feel better. Cause I feel like crap now. And there's nobody to talk to now cause everyone's at the romeo juliet play. Oh fuck.

2009-04-25T15:14:00.003+08:00

We all carry these things, inside that no one else can see. They hold us down like anchors, they drown us out at sea. I look up to the sky, there may be nothing there to see. But if I don't believe in him, why would he believe in me?
-

Cause I rock major big time, am cool like that, kick ass and set trends like I usually do. So you can kiss my arse.

"I feel weird recently. No wonder. Screamo is my drug."- Timo.
Good use of metaphor (Y).

2009-04-22T21:19:00.002+08:00

I've got a secret. It's at the tip of my tongue, it's at the back of my lungs. And I've got to keep it, I know something you don't know. It sits in silence. Eats away at me. It feeds like cancer. This guilt could fill a fucking sea. Pulling teeth, wolves at my door. Now falling and failing is all I know. This disease is getting worse. I counted my blessings, now I'll count this curse. The only thing I realy know, I can't sleep at night. I may look happy, but honestly dear. The only way I'll realy smile, is if you cut me ear to ear. I see the vultures, they watch me bleed. They lick their lips, as all the shame spills out of me.
-

Shit, stuck in my head.

May edit this space later, ta.

skinny ass

2009-04-19T23:55:00.015+08:00

Omg today was damn funnnn. We were like trying on clothes and taking pictures like nuts in the changing room hahahaha. And walked like alot alot from j8 to dhoby to chinatown to takashimaya finally LOL. Sorry lah Ying :( You still love me right. I'm like so cute (V) LOL.
Bought 2pieces today. Happyyy although they are like digging a hole in my wallet. Saw quite a few friends like Abigail and Stacia and Vishnu. Then after that went back to j8 and met Stacia for awhile then back home.
Syf tmr dieeeeeeeee. Throat pain.

Btw my uncle bought me a new 20inch monitor which is fucking ass big. At first was like WHOA DAMN CLEAR AND NICE but then after look through my pictures walau make me look fat sia. Actually makes everyone look fat. And I actually lost quite a bit of weight when I was sick (Y) YAYYYYY!!!

I hope everything stays this way for us. Please let it be.

2009-04-18T23:39:00.004+08:00

Okay apparently I'm deprived of sleep. I took a 4-hour-long nap and my brother said I went nuts and started laughing in my sleep wtf LOL.
And I haven't fully recovered yet. Today's choir was damn joke. Everybody was freaking out because we thought we might have got hfmd from Sophie(HAHAHAHAHAHA). Plus Peijia got fever which didn't help at all. We're so gonna die for syf lol.

Ms Lee is making alot alot alot of drama in choir recently. Timo's mother is her friend(like wtf right?!?!?!)

Me: eh ms lee say she gonna bar me out from syf cause she say I show attitude to her leh hahaha.
Timo: tell her mrs poon is gonna kick her ass!
Me: then she would be like who is mrs poon to you.
Timo: say my bestfriend's mom you fat whore!

hahahahahaha.

Me: eh ms lee you know mrs poon is it.
Ms Lee: YA I KNOW HER VERY WELL! WHY? SHE ASK YOU IS IT?
Me: no lah her son told me.
Ms Lee: OH HELP ME SAY HI TO HIM. I KNOW HER VERY WELL. MRS POON IS A VERY NICE PERSON. I LIKE HER VERY MUCH. I KNOW ALOT OF PEOPLE ONE. ALOT OF PEOPLE ALSO KNOW ME.

(caps due to exclaimation and excitement)
And me and Shanthini were like HUH WTF-ing.

p/s shopping tmr like finally.

sickkkk

2009-04-15T23:41:00.002+08:00

So I skipped school for 2days and got a good rest. Back to school tmr. Suckaxzxz :(

Oh cause you don't care, yes you simply don't care..

phoebebangsyouz

2009-04-12T20:42:00.007+08:00

Okay so if it isn't obvious, I've cut bangs. And Nat comes up with the lamest thing everrr.

Me: my bangs is growing damn fast eh I can feel it growing.
Nat: HAHAHA I don't know why but you sound like a plant.

And everytime I look in the mirror I see this damn cute girl(myself, obviously?!?!?!)

Shanthini: phoebe very pretty eh.
Uma: ya especially when she lets down her hair.
Me: I think you should stop complimenting me cause I have very high self esteem lollll.

Hahahahahahahahahaha. Classic. It was all jokes and fun lah don't take it too seriously.

Okay moving on. School's so boring nowadays. Blah said it one thousand times but so what. There's pft tmr and I'm totally gonna get a bronze cause I'm lazy. Actually, I'm lazy to do anything. And yet for some reason I'm losing weight, I think. + I've been eating quite alot I guess.
And was planning to go to the flea titan but Nat can't make it. Ying is too lazy. I'm too lazy to call other people out. So that's that. Oh yeah and I watched sisterhood of the traveling pants & sisterhood of the traveling pants 2. I cried like 3 fucking times for the first one. It's pretty goooood. But the second one is only average.
Ehhhhh Roy and Geraint!!! I wanna watch fast and furious 4(at the cinema)!!! But Roy went to download it already -_-

So people are getting more and more materialistic. Thinking popularity is all that matters. Yuck. Sucking up to people(seriously?!?!?!) and being cheap. Come on you're like worshipping people instead of being their friends. Don't bring yourself down so much. Irky.

p/s LOVE YOU VIC ISLAND FOR MAD WORLD LOL. LOVE YOU AND ADAM LAMBERT.
p/p/s Tyson Apostol is damn hottt and I like Sierra(from survivor)!!!
p/p/p/s
PHOEBE; says:
omg i wanna join survivor leh
PHOEBE; says:
LOL
timo says:
you sure lose

So mean righttt. :((((

2009-04-06T21:47:00.011+08:00

Feel like a model. Everytime. lol.
-

Tiredddd. Just came back from vch for syf rehearsal. There was this bus opposite us when we were waiting for our bus, it was filled with australians. And when I told Uma about it, Shanthini and Uma were like squealing over them LOL. The angmohs freakin' waved at all of us and there was alot of crap happening inside the bus but I was just too tired, too sleepy. Think am just gonna go to school after recess tmr. I.need.rest.

Speaking of tired, I was complaining to ah pa how packed my schedule is and now he is telling me how the arabs love us cause we are hardworking and honest wtfff LOL.
&
Gawaine the Crusher of Morning Stars says:
well just remember something eh. . .
Gawaine the Crusher of Morning Stars says:
stress doesnt exist. . .
Gawaine the Crusher of Morning Stars says:
the only reason it exists is because you build it inside your own head. . .

Hm. True.

hand of blood

2009-04-05T22:39:00.007+08:00

I saw you look away
Is what you've seen too much to take
Or are you blind and seeing nothing?

luv bandboys (V)

2009-04-04T01:44:00.011+08:00

shawn milke is damn gay but damn hot.

eh timopoon he's cuter than craig luh.

I think I'm only ever gonna date band guys. Or guys who look like band guys. LOL.

Wow at least the week ended in a pretty good note. Amaths srp tmr ughhh.

2009-04-01T21:23:00.048+08:00

Opened the d drive and I see "PHOEBE'S LONG AWAITED PHOTOS". lol.

Hi Matt you're nuts for wanting to watch my syf performance and calling my hideous gown angelic. Still, missed ya :)

2009-03-31T22:17:00.003+08:00

People are self-contradicting, aren't they. They love, they care, they say they will be there for you forever. Bullshit. The next day they'll leave you, silently. Taking away pain slowly, thinking it won't hurt as much as the blatant truth. The schedule's been pretty hectic, making me take off my mind somewhere else. There's not much to anticipate on when all you do is go to the same place called hell at 7am every morning, the sun blazing hot it really burns, sweating like a mad pig, seeing the same old people it's almost sick, sitting during recess doing nothing. There's nobody to relate to, cause they don't understand. Glancing through we see fakeness behind their eyes, over-exaggeration just to stand out, so plastic it disgusts me. And people who pretend, who boasts, fuck. It's a cycle isn't it. One moment all's good, another minute all's gone. I see you all alone, abandoned, looking glum, I comfort you, no you don't appreciate, cause greed is part of our human nature, we onlt want what we don't have. A sheep? And the shepherd. Then again, goodness is punished right. So why don't we just be Hitler-ish. Bang the people who neglect you. Off-track. And I'll ask myself, what's the point in living? You get my point, don't you. No you don't?

2009-03-25T00:19:00.002+08:00

Today, I've realised how much you actually appreciate me. Omg I love you like how monkeys love climbing on trees. Damn random but yeah you get it :) Faster get your butt out lah!

2009-03-21T22:12:00.003+08:00

Pris and me finally celebrated our "birthdays" together after like what. 2months? LOL. And we didn't buy the small cake from kfc cause we figured there won't be enough space to put 16 candles let alone 17. So we sat down in carls jr and talk and talk and talk. We finally did some catching up after like I don't know how long man. And I so wanna go sajc but she said the reason why it looks so big is just because the kindergarten,primary,secondary,jc schools are together so actually it's quite small. lol but I still wanna go there. And derek is appealling to np from sa. Wtf right. Then in the end that bitch/ahlian ps me after 2-3hours and keep saying so sorryyy you not angry right. LOL. Damn gay but quite fun lah. Hang out some other time soon (:
p/s eh pris we forgot to take pictures!

photobooth at nat's house :D

2009-03-18T22:16:00.003+08:00

Omg I had to crop like half of my face cause nat is a freakin' big joke. She drew on my eye using her liquid eyeliner(that she has never used) and it's out of place so one of my eye looks 5times bigger than the other LOLLLL.

-nat passes me the thumbdrive-
phoebe: you put all the pictures inside the thumbdrive already?
nat: mm. ya.
phoebe: wow that's fast.

Right when I reached the bus stop going home she smsed me "omg phoebs I forgot to put the pictures inside the thumbdrive HAHAHAHAHA."
That is nat for you :)

NAT YOU ARE A BIG BIG BIG JOKE BUT I STILL LOVE YOU <33333

p/s you owe my the pictures :)

emotional wreck

2009-03-16T00:18:00.002+08:00

Sometimes you make me feel like I'm on top. But now I feel right at the bottom, with rocks crashing. Painful. I don't feel any sense of belonging. Feel. Lost. Feel. Helpless. With no one to reach for. I see darkness everywhere. Where's the light? Where's the light? Guide me. I need support. I fucking need support. Why isn't there any support?! Can't someone give me support? Pillars of strength I once had had just been destroyed, demolished. By the loneliness of one's self. Well at least we had our times.. I know this will be over soon enough. Hopefully.

2009-03-14T23:36:00.002+08:00

it's time i use this space to blog.like finally.cause i'm getting sick of lj.
just got back from class retreat yesterday.which was fine.better than expected.i missed my toilet though.holidays.a freakin' good 1week break before studying and listening in classes again.and plans for the week are coming along fine.hope there are no last minute cancellations crap and hopefully i could squeeze in a day for shopping alone.
today i've wasted an entire day uploading the retreat pictures LOL.and msning.sighhh.and tmr i shall upload them into facebook.and thus the end of my very first post in words lol.

class retreat

2009-03-14T19:36:00.073+08:00

pictures credits to joey and nat and me (:

cause i'm not dead yet and oli sykes is gorgeous.

2009-03-07T23:36:00.003+08:00

Don't you think it feels like summer is coming (although it's raining like everyday)?

vday in school

2009-02-14T23:30:00.010+08:00

2009-02-06T20:49:00.011+08:00

cny

2009-01-30T23:43:00.014+08:00

I'll edit this post tmr cause ben just sent me some pictures of the cny celebration and the sharing folder is taking forever
[edited]
damn it lah the sharing folder doesn't work so I have to wait for Joey to come online to send me the pictures. so I'll post them some other time.

4peace cny celebration

2009-01-24T19:40:00.033+08:00

continuation from previous post:

2009-01-22T23:29:00.031+08:00

dickies

2009-01-17T19:59:00.006+08:00

Which should I buy?!

or

or

choir/cca booth

2009-01-09T21:18:00.019+08:00

2009-01-06T21:50:00.002+08:00

marina bay countdown 2009

2009-01-01T22:52:00.033+08:00

say hi to my new toy leh :)

2008-12-27T20:57:00.005+08:00

yay my christmas present from my uncle!!!

curlszzzzzzz

2008-12-24T23:12:00.000+08:00

misssss :(

2008-12-22T13:32:00.001+08:00

cheryl I kope from your friendster :)

ice skating

2008-12-20T12:25:00.041+08:00

credits to sophielianahlian the photographer of the day :D

2008-12-17T21:24:00.015+08:00

the rest are in sophie's cam :)

chelsea smile

2008-12-14T22:09:00.002+08:00

natapigaroooo

2008-12-11T16:25:00.039+08:00

pt.2

2008-12-10T15:25:00.038+08:00

2008-12-09T21:04:00.052+08:00

Honey,this is UK for me pt.1

2008-12-08T12:34:00.063+08:00

2008-12-05T18:58:00.001+08:00

Bulls make money, bears make money, pigs get slaughtered.